In a recent post, I noted that Black folk do not actually love fried chicken more so than anyone else, despite what the stereotype says. After watching this video, however, I may be wrong.
Sunday, August 28, 2011
Thursday, August 25, 2011
#13: Why Do We Not Do Thrill-Seeking Activities?
Bear Grylls (image #1). He is one crazy S.O.B.
One day I'm watching TV with my white friends and they turn on Man vs. Wild. Much to their surprise, I had never watched this show before. "You've never seen Man vs. Wild??" they said. "Oh you have to watch." From what I gathered, this crazy white man, aptly named Bear Grylls, goes out and tries to survive in crazy locations with limited supplies and resources. Nevermind that there's a friggin camera crew following him around that obviously needs food and shelter and would obviously be carrying all sorts of necessary equipment with them. This guy is totally badass.
While watching this particular episode, I saw one of the most disgusting things EVER. Watch the entire video.
Yeah, that's right. BEAR GRYLLS JUST DRANK HIS PEE. And then he puts the shirt that he just peed on back on himself!! I actually threw up in the back of my mouth when I was watching this. My friends all thought the episode was very cool, and couldn't understand why I was so utterly disgusted. This begged the question:
Why do Black people not do thrill-seeking activities?
The short answer: we have enough crap in our lives to worry about. You see, white peoples' lives are about as bland as British food. Everything is so easy breezy. So to spice things up, they do all kinds of crazy things, like car surfing (image #2), storm chasing, skydiving, bungee jumping (image #3), and heliskiing (image #4; I didn't even know what the hell that was until my co-worker told me about it). You will almost never see one of us doing something that stupid. Hell, Black folk will barely even go camping (no image for this one, because none exist on the Internet). We live in cities; the only animals we deal with are pigeons and squirrels.
Anyways, I digress. We are not thrill seekers because there is no need for a Black person to seek thrills. Look at this list of "thrills" we have to worry about, some on a regular basis:
Driving While Black
Living off food stamps
Living in Texas, Mississippi, or Alabama
Avoiding that crackhead around the corner
Making it home from the bus stop without getting mugged
Surviving past the age of 25
Dating a white girl, then going home to meet her parents
With all these thrills, who needs to go rock climbing with no harness?
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